Ruth| Two-Sided Devotion | | Posted by Terri on Monday, October 10, 2011 at 11:32am | I bet you are wondering why I am wearing this "new teacher" sign. After all, it is obvious that I am a new teacher. The week before school started, within a 24-hour time period, I left my workout gloves at the gym, important papers at Barnes and Noble, and my purse and computer unattended in the work-room for two hours. This "sign" explains my condition, or gives me excuse...how about the time I showed up at the in-service with my pants sagging below my waist - eating had become an afterthought and after the lunch break, I was wearing a new belt from TJ Maxx. I can take this sign off when I am pushing my cart in and out of Master Baumann's classroom or when I am dragging my box-on-wheels up and down the hallways. I can put my sign back on when I think of my 31st Anniversay, the day I was dining at Jag's with my husband and I gave him a birthday card instead of an Anniversay card at the dinner table. Most of you have been new teachers once...this experience can be likened to Enkidu from Gilgamesh, the Hero, the hunter who survived in the woods until adulthood, was lured by the goddess Ishtar, the one that taught him how to eat like a human. But I was not lured by a goddess; God compelled me. Nevertheless, this devotion is not about me becoming a new teacher and how silly I may look or feel; it is about "devotion": what it means, its two-sides and how it relates to us.
According to Noah Webster's 1828 American English Dictionary, '"devotion" is the state of being dedicated, consecrated, solemnly set apart for a particular purpose, a yielding of the heart and affections." However, not only are we to be set apart to God, but God sets Himself apart for us through intercession, intervention, a commitment to fulfilling His purpose in us. I will use myself as an example...before I got hired at CCS, the Lord asked me, "Do you trust Me with your future?" I answered, "Yes, Lord, I trust you with my future." And then my heart was tested...I interviewed for a few jobs, each time hopeful, but then the rejections came and I was reminded that the Lord had something better; He could be trusted and I must wait (it had been two long years!). Then over this past Memorial Day weekend, my son and husband went to a soccer tournament and I stayed home to seek the Lord through fasting and prayer; I wanted to hear God's voice and get His perspective on what my purpose was. Three days later, I received a phone call from the principal's assistant, asking me if I would be interested in a part-time teaching position. During the interview, I asked the principal who had recommended me for the job and her answer was no one. My name just popped into her head! God's commitment to me was evident that day.
Another personal example...I had been searching for the right book to use for my 8th grade challenge class. I came upon, The American Covenant, but continued to ask the Lord for His will. On that Sunday, I needed an answer. I was in the middle of a 21-day Daniel fast and was specifically praying for God's perfect will in regards to the curriculum and where He wanted my family to fellowship. I secretly asked the Lord to confirm His will by having the pastor speak about covenant in his sermon that day. Pastor shared about covenant and proceeded to talk about why Christians fail to wait upon God. He spoke of three types of water sources: living water, the best source; well water, the second best source; and cistern water, the third source. However in this case the cistern was broken and could not hold the dirty water. The Pastor likened the broken cistern to those who are given a promise, a covenant, but rather than wait for the best source, the third source is chosen because of impatience and a lack of trust. Then the pastor did something that I have never seen anyone do before...he told the congregation that he believed there was someone in the audience that had the ending of his sermon. My heart began to pound. Not only did God confirm His will regarding "The American Covenant" and show me that our family belonged at that fellowship, but I had the ending of his sermon. God was using a silly curriculum decision as an object lesson on how He cares about everything that concerns His people and that He is dedicated to fulfilling His covenant in us. I stood to my feet and testified to God's answer to prayer, the waiting process, and His devotion to each of us along the way.
Not only is devotion two-sided, but sometimes we fail to yield our hearts and affections to God and hear His heart on a matter. The other day I was pondering how the Pharisees and scribes followed the law so intently and missed the heart of Jesus. Jesus did good on the Sabbath and they were more concerned about Him obeying the law. It was easy for me to dismiss their behavior as something that I would never be a part of, but wait a minute...is it possible to go through the motions of "devotion" and miss God's heart in my own life? Could I be a person committed to prayer and fasting, see God move and still miss Him? Am I comfortable with doing the outward things at the expense of by-passing God's heart? God showed me that I was!
Not only am I to understand that devotion is a state of yielding the heart and affections to God, but God has a purpose for me. When Jesus tells me that I will make it to the other side of the lake and a massive storm hits and I think I am going to drown, it is in that moment that God calls upon me to stay devoted, yielded, engaged, trusting in Him for the word that He spoke, regardless of the natural circumstances. I may be a new teacher, riding on a roller coaster, but I am grateful because it causes me to cry out to Him. My sign reads, "new teacher" but if you flip it over it also reads, "Disciple," "Devotee" because I can not be the teacher that God has purposed without me yielding my heart and affections fully to Him and listening to His heart on every matter. Yes, devotion is two-sided; may we live in a constant state of yielding and refuse the temptation to walk through the motions and by-pass God's heart. May we fully embrace His banner - it reads, "Love." His banner over us is love.
 discipleship
| | | | | The Centrality of Christ | | Posted by Terri on Monday, January 24, 2011 at 1:14pm | It has been one year since my last entry, not because of a lack of inspiration; but because the Lord has been drastically changing my paradigm. In 2010, I spent several months writing Immeasurably More, emphasizing Christ as Head, the church as the body, fitly joined together as the "one new man," referenced in Ephesians 2. After completion of my first draft, I found myself in a time-warp between head knowledge and experiential understanding. It was time to set the book aside and experience God's eternal purpose in the church.
During the first six months gathering with believers committed to Christ expressed in His body, we shared meals and personal testimonies and went from house to house. However, I was plagued with the relentless question: "After leaving religion, has religion left you?" It made me doubt what we were doing even though the Lord had directed our steps. I wanted so desperately to go back to that which was comfortable: an assigned "leader," an agenda, familiar songs...however, the centrality of Christ trumped all doubt. And when the temptation to quit was at its strongest, I reminded myself that reducing church to a place only negated my need to make Christ supreme; but, when the Holy Spirit directed the gathering, Christ would be expressed in His body. His home was becoming His people, not a meeting place.
The church I am getting to know is beginning to no longer look like the headless horseman, independent of God; she exudes divine life, she is dependent upon the Head. Each believer is looking more and more like Jesus. Each gathering is unique, creative and full of life. I dislike missing a gathering and I look forward to seeing each person. No longer do I long for a new venue; He is who I am looking for.
one new man | | | | | For Intimacy's Sake | | Posted by Terri on Saturday, January 23, 2010 at 9:15am | The Lord has been speaking to me about intimacy this morning. His analogy? my new puppy...
I love my jet black, 13 week old, Cockapoo named Sophie. I have had her for seven weeks now and wonder when she will finally grasp, "Outside, go potty!" Even though I go to bed early every night and awake very early each morning so that she can be relieved outside, I am willing to forego my schedule so that she can remain on her eating and sleeping schedule; I am willing to keep her tethered to my living room table when she is active and keep her secluded to a crate while she sleeps even though she cries for freedom; I am willing to rescue her from an older, more cantankerous dog; and I am willing to purchase the necessary items for success like the Tell Bell so that she can initiate the communication and have more freedom in my home. However, I wonder when it will all sink in.
I realize now that the true signs of Sophie's complete understanding of my love for her will be realized when she prances over to the Tell Bell that protrudes from my entryway floor; hits the metal top, decked with a paw print and sounds the alarm that tells me that it is time to go potty. Her initiative will communicate to me that she understands what the bell is for and that potty is to go outside, not in. (Never mind the fact that Sophie is afraid of the round metal disk and every time I lift her paw and strike the bell, she winces and growls at the foreign object). However, I continue to follow through with the consistent training, knowing that she will eventually understand.
There is a great deal at play in Sophie's mind: knowledge, wisdom, trust, release of fear, self-control and obedience. However, there is even more in the mind of her master--the end result is to see Sophie house trained, but the process will allow her more freedom, mutual trust, but even more so, the satisfaction of knowing that true communication, connectedness, and intimacy has occured. I will know that my ways are understood, that I am trusted and that her fears were released for a greater good.
This leads me to the nagging question raised as I keep her in my robotic schedule...If I continue to take Sophie out every thirty minutes and bypass most of her mistakes, am I limiting the opportunity for her to communicate with me by her own initiative? Am I limiting true connectedness, communication and eventual intimacy? After all, potty training is only one aspect of obedience training. The more important goals are trust, understanding, communication, mutual love, and true intimacy.
My puppy training speaks loudly of what God is trying to communicate with me. I understand the reasons why God sometimes tethers me and waits until I have an accident. He can then lovingly reiterate what is needed in order to see me walk in true freedom, trust and intimacy with Him. His training is not about what I gain, but more about what we both acquire--understanding, relationship, trust, great communication and a oneness in purpose. He wants me to understand that He loves me and goes to great lengths to bring completeness in me. Potty training is just one aspect of many that serve to communicate His longing for intimacy with me.
When Sophie hits that bell for the first time, indicating her need to go outside and go potty, my heart will be overwhelmed with the understanding that we have communicated with one another, that she trusts me, and that my love for her has broken through all the consistent repetitious behavior. Yes, I want her potty trained, however, I want even more our connectedness, understanding and mutual intimacy. Isn't this what God ultimately wants? know God | | | | | Divine Fingerprints | | Posted by Terri on Thursday, November 19, 2009 at 11:51am | God's fingerprints can be evident and His voice clear through ordinary circumstances, if we will just stop and listen. Let me explain...my newlywed son has been adjusting to work, schedules and the responsibilities of paying the bills on time. After his honeymoon, the school of hard knocks came quickly and for this conscientious mom, I have had to watch from afar. I have fought the desire to rescue my son, while realizing that I have not properly prepared him for the real world and thankfully, God is faithful in spite of my lack.
His first challenge came when he thought that his rent was due on the sixth of the month, since that is when he signed the lease--that makes sense doesn't it? However, when he received a late notice from his rental company, he went immediately to pay his bill, only to find a hefty late fee tacked onto his rent, without a grace period or any mercy. The contract's fine print stated that all fees were due on the first of the month, regardless of when the lease was signed.
The second surprise came today, unbeknownst to me. I was leaving my house and felt an overwhelming sense of intercessory prayer come upon me on behalf of my son. I assumed that he was at work and began to pray God's blessings, favor, provision and anything else the Lord inspired me to say. This was no ordinary prayer, but a clear mandate as I interceeded for him. And then my phone rang...it was my son!
"Wow!" I said as I answered the phone, "I was just praying for you."
I proceeded to tell him what I had prayed and then he informed me of what had transpired. He stayed home from work so that he could see the doctor and take care of his strep throat. When he went to pick up the prescription, he was told that it was not covered on his health insurance and after calling the company, he discovered that it had been cancelled because he hadn't paid his bill. (You have to understand that my son is very responsible and thought that his bill was being paid through direct transfer--never mind the coupon book that he got in the mail. So now he was accruing more debt: the doctor visit, lab work and the prescription drugs and he would have to start over by reapplying for health insurance!)
My son went to the insurance company immediately and this is when I could see that God was showing him favor, blessing, and provision in answer to my prayer...his insurance was reinstated immediately and the direct transfer was set up, the doctor's office placed the billing after the insurance was set in place and he came out with a clean slate, minus the extra $25 to reactivate the insurance.
Later I received a phone call that my son had a crack in his windshield from a stray rock. Once again, he contacted the insurance company immediately and there was more good news...a no-deductible policy and the windshield would be replaced in a couple of days--free of charge! God's hand moved quickly on my son's behalf and I was able to see how I had a part to play in the favor, blessing and provision of the Lord. To God be the glory!
Hearing God's voice | | | | | At Peace with My Enemies | | Posted by Terri on Thursday, September 17, 2009 at 1:10pm | Recently, I felt prompted by the Holy Spirit to study the scriptures on the topic of seeking God. Even though I had not gotten far into my study before it was time to go to my cycling class at the gym, it was not unlike the Lord to have more to say. There have been many times when my conversation with the Lord has extended beyond the time allotted, and His instruction has moved from the sanctuary of my bedroom to a stationary bicycle surrounded by sweaty patrons swaying to the beat of loud music. But this time, it was after a hard workout that the Lord spoke a portion of His Word to me, "He makes even his enemies to be at peace with him."
As soon as I arrived home, I bolted to my Bible to find out where the verse was located and what its significance was. When I finally found Proverbs 16:7, it read, "When a man's ways please the Lord, He makes even his enemies to be at peace with him" (KJVER). Not only was I ecstatic that this verse spoke about seeking God, but I knew from previous studies, that one of the many ways I please the Lord is by believing who He says He is and that He rewards me when I diligently seek Him (Heb. 11:6).
In the past, I understood Proverbs 16:7 to mean: "because I diligently seek the Lord, even my enemies will be at peace with me." However, this time, I heard this scripture read differently, "as I make a habit to diligently seek God, He makes me at peace with my enemies": He changes my heart toward them, I am unfazed by what they do to me, and they have no power over me. As I seek God, the source of my peace shifts from those who oppose me, to God and what He does in my heart in spite of my enemies. Wow! What a powerful revelation to live by--I was already being rewarded for diligently seeking Him. relationship, not religion | | | |
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